well now that i'm finally getting over my relapse after the last 14-15mnths were wasted and i totally destroyed all of my gains that took 6yrs to build up...i wanna get as big as possible.to the point when i walk into the gym,remove my hoodie wearing nothing but a wife beater or sleeveless flannel and have ppl gasp and say "holy s**t,wtf is wrong with him?! he looks like a genetic mutation that done mutated!"

that's how big...